Factual background
15It is common ground that Mr Ploder first made contact with Fiona, through an internet website, around mid-2010, and that they physically met about one month later. Mr Ploder was living at a residence in 54 McLaren Place, Ingleburn (the Ingleburn residence), and Fiona was living with her parents at a residence in 97 Cabarita Road, Concord (the Concord residence). The relationship between Mr Ploder and Fiona developed, and at some point in time, Mr Ploder and Fiona proposed to purchase a property to eventually live together.
16A long-standing business associate of Mr Ploder, Zoran Kasic (Mr Kasic), swore an affidavit (dated 15 November 2011) alleging, among other things, that in about the second week of June 2010, Mr Ploder introduced Fiona to Mr Kasic as his girlfriend. Another friend of Mr Ploder, Caldia Rodriguez (Ms Rodriguez), swore an affidavit (dated 28 October 2011) similarly alleging that in or about June 2010, Mr Ploder introduced Fiona to her as Mr Ploder's "partner". Ms Rodriguez also alleges that on 17 July 2010, at her birthday party at which Mr Ploder and Fiona were present, Fiona said to her that she and Mr Ploder were planning on marrying probably in October of 2011.
17On 20 September 2010, a meeting was arranged where Mr Ploder, Fiona and the defendant met with a financial broker, Guiseppina Mammoliti (Ms Mammoliti), for the purpose of arranging finance for the acquisition by Mr Ploder and Fiona of the Wetherill Park residence.
18In her affidavit (dated 25 November 2011), Ms Mammoliti gave evidence that on about 14 September 2010, when Mr Ploder called Ms Mammoliti to make an appointment to discuss arranging finance for the potential purchase of a property, he said that the proposed acquisition was for "my fiancé and I". Ms Mammoliti also gave evidence that at the meeting of 20 September 2010, Mr Ploder introduced Fiona to Ms Mammoliti, in the presence of the defendant, as his fiancé, and he continued throughout the meeting, to refer to Fiona as his fiancé. Ms Mammoliti also alleges Mr Ploder referred to the defendant as his mother in law. Ms Mammoliti also gave evidence that during the meeting, Fiona said, again in the presence of the defendant, that instead of paying for a wedding, Ms Mammoliti would be providing $100,000 as a gift to be applied towards a deposit on the Wetherill Park residence. Ms Mammoliti also alleges that the defendant herself made comments to the same effect.
19On 27 September 2010, a second meeting was arranged with Ms Mammoliti, which was also attended by Mr Ploder, Fiona and the defendant, to progress the application for finance for the potential purchase of the Wetherill Park residence. Ms Mammoliti gives evidence that, at this second meeting, she explained to the defendant that in order to obtain loan approval for Fiona and Mr Ploder, the sum of $100,000 proposed to be provided by the defendant for the purchase of a home must be a non-refundable gift. Ms Mammoliti says the defendant then made comments to the effect that she understood that the sum needed to be provided as a non-refundable gift, and confirming that Fiona did not want a wedding, and that Fiona instead wished to use the money towards the purchase of a home for Mr Ploder and herself.
20At this second meeting, the defendant signed a statutory declaration, witnessed by Ms Mammoliti, declaring:
I am giving my daughter $100,000 as a non-refundable gift because she does not want a wedding celebration but would prefer to purchase a property.
21Ms Mammoliti gave evidence that there was no suggestion in any conversation that the sum of $100,000 was a loan or was to be repaid to the defendant.
22Ms Mammoliti also alleges that, later in October 2010, when the defendant called Ms Mammoliti to advise that the term deposit from which the defendant's gift of $100,000 would be advanced had expired and was therefore ready to be transferred, the defendant mentioned that Fiona was excited that she was buying a home with Mr Ploder and getting married, and that Fiona and Mr Ploder are a "happy couple".
23Mr Ploder alleges that around 17 October 2010, in his presence at the Concord residence, Fiona told the defendant that she would be moving to live with Mr Ploder. According to Mr Ploder, the defendant said she preferred Fiona to do so after marriage, but that she nonetheless agreed to the proposal because their marriage was imminent, and she hoped it would improve her daughter's health. Fiona's father, Vincenzo Garcea (Mr Garcea), allegedly agreed and said it would be easier for Fiona to live with Mr Ploder because she had already been spending more time with Mr Ploder at the Ingleburn residence than at the Concord residence. Mr Ploder alleges that Fiona then moved in with him at the Ingleburn residence on 19 October 2010.
24Mr Kasic also gave affidavit evidence that in late October 2010 he noticed a black Toyota Yaris vehicle parked at the front of Mr Ploder's house, and that when he asked Mr Ploder about the car, he was told it belonged to Fiona as she was living with him at the Ingleburn residence. Mr Kasic alleges that thereafter, whenever he visited Mr Ploder at the Ingleburn residence, he always noticed Fiona's car parked at the front. He also alleges that during his visits to Mr Ploder, he sometimes observed Fiona having breakfast with Mr Ploder, dressed in what appeared to be her pyjamas. He also says he did not see other people living with Mr Ploder and Fiona, or other cars parked at the front of, the Ingleburn residence.
25The then-owner of the Wetherill Park residence, Joe Tolomeo (Mr Tolomeo), swore an affidavit on 28 October 2011, giving evidence consistent with Mr Kasic and Mr Ploder, that when Mr Ploder and Fiona visited the Wetherill Park residence prior to purchasing it, Fiona mentioned that she and Mr Ploder were living together.
26In her affidavit, Ms Rodriguez also gave evidence that when she visited Mr Ploder at the Ingleburn residence in late October 2010, both Mr Ploder and Fiona said to her that they were living together, and that Fiona showed Ms Rodriguez around the house, and that Ms Rodriguez noticed that Fiona's clothes were placed in the same bedroom cupboard as Mr Ploder's clothes, and that other personal items of Fiona were scattered in the bathroom.
27The resident of the property neighbouring Mr Ploder's Ingleburn residence, Paul Chapman (Mr Chapman), swore an affidavit (on 28 May 2012) alleging that "in or about late October or early September 2010 [sic]", until about early February 2011, he often noticed a black Toyota Yaris vehicle parked in the carport of the Ingleburn residence. He gave evidence that, more often than not, he noticed that the vehicle was present at the Ingleburn residence before 7:00am (when he leaves for work in the morning) and after 5:30pm (when he arrives home from work).
28These allegations, that Fiona in effect lived at the Ingleburn residence with Mr Ploder from mid or late October 2010, were disputed by the defendant. In her affidavit (dated 21 October 2011), the defendant accepted that Fiona occasionally spent some nights at the Ingleburn residence with Mr Ploder, but asserted that these occasions were limited to approximately four weekends plus three or four other nights during weekdays, over a period from September 2010 to February 2011. The defendant accepts that Mr Ploder visited the Concord residence about three or four times per week, took Fiona out for coffee or dinner, and on about two occasions between September 2010 and February 2011 he spent the night at the Concord residence (though in a separate bedroom to Fiona). The defendant also alleges that even in late 2010, Fiona referred to Mr Ploder as her "boyfriend", not fiancé, and that the defendant referred to Mr Ploder as Fiona's "fidanzato", which in Italian can mean fiancé but can also refer to a "serious boyfriend/girlfriend relationship".
29In late October 2010, the loan application brokered by Ms Mammoliti was conditionally approved, however Mr Ploder gives evidence that the plan to purchase the Wetherill Park residence was cancelled by Mr Ploder in early November 2010, as a result of Fiona's poor health. Ms Mammoliti gave evidence consistent with this. In her affidavit, she alleges she received a call from Mr Ploder in the first week of November 2010, requesting cancellation of the loan due to Fiona's poor health, and Fiona's improvement of health was his priority.
30In his affidavit dated 10 November 2011, Mr Ploder alleges that in November 2010, Fiona said to Mr Ploder that she wanted to "leave everything" for Mr Ploder in case anything happened to her, including her superannuation, and she then handed to Mr Ploder a piece of paper which she said would give effect to that wish. Mr Ploder alleges he told her to throw the paper away and not to entertain those thoughts. Mr Ploder also alleges, that about two weeks later, he found the same piece of paper in Fiona's jewellery box, and again asked her to throw it away. He says he has not seen the paper since.
31Mr Kasic alleges that in or about early November 2010, at the Ingleburn residence, Mr Ploder said to Mr Kasic that he was engaged to Fiona and that they were looking to purchase a house at Wetherill Park.
32Mr Ploder alleges he formally proposed to Fiona on 30 November 2010, at the home of, and in the presence of, Mr Ploder's parents. However, he alleges that he and Fiona were effectively engaged some months prior to this formality, as they conducted themselves as a couple and were already making plans for marriage in October 2011 (T107-T108).
33On Christmas Day, 25 December 2010, Fiona handwrote the following letter to Mr Ploder (Exhibit P3):
To My Gorgeous Man,
Merry Christmas. This has been the best year of my life having you in it. I never knew God created a man who could be so compassionate, considerate & loving.
When you say you are in love with me, I feel it in my heart & it's because, I feel the same way. I know you are my soulmate. There can never be anyone else, that can make me feel, the way you do.
You are the Perfect Man [original formatting]. You are not selfish, you are respectful, funny, loving, tender & understanding. I feel you understand me on every level.
I wish every woman could experience a man like you. But unfortunately, it can't be with you because you're mine.
I give you my heart, I give you my soul, my fantasies & dreams, & together I know we will be devoted to each other.
I pray for 2011 to bring us love, happiness, peace, healing & fulfilment with me. Loving you with all my heart baby, know that I'm always with you & there for you forever.
God Bless You!
All My Love,
XXX Your Fee
34In her affidavit, Ms Rodriguez alleges that on 31 December 2010, at a new year's eve party at which she and Fiona were present, Fiona made comments about the high temperatures in Sydney, and particularly while living in Ingleburn.
35Mr Ploder alleges that during a barbeque at the Concord residence on 9 January 2011, the defendant and Mr Garcea encouraged Mr Ploder and Fiona to reconsider purchasing the Wetherill Park residence, and said they would "give" $100,000 towards the purchase price. Mr Ploder alleges Fiona agreed, and suggested to Mr Ploder in a separate conversation that the house be registered 95% in her name, to isolate the house from Mr Ploder's personal financial exposure from his business, but that in the event that she died, he would receive the house.
36In early January 2011, Mr Ploder alleges he and Fiona contacted Ms Mammoliti to advise her that they were again interested in purchasing the Wetherill Park residence, and received confirmation from Ms Mammoliti that finance approval had not lapsed. Again, this is consistent with Ms Mammoliti's evidence that she received a call from Mr Ploder and Fiona (although she dates the call at 3 January 2011) in which they advised they were again interested in purchasing the Wetherill Park residence.
37Fiona and Mr Ploder purchased the Wetherill Park residence, in shares of 95% and 5% respectively, with an early settlement taking place just before mid-January 2011. The purchase price of the Wetherill Park residence appears to have been financed by the payment of $100,000 from the defendant, the loan brokered through Ms Mammoliti, a payment of about $65,000 from the Fiona's personal savings, and a payment of about $4,500 by Mr Ploder as commission fees for the real estate agent involved in the transaction. Whether the defendant advanced the sum of $100,000 as a loan or as a gift was the subject of controversy before me, and is a question which I will address in some further detail.
38Mr Ploder alleges that prior to their proposed marriage, he and Fiona wanted to lose weight, and both of them therefore decided to undertake an intragastric balloon insertion procedure. Annexed to his affidavit dated 29 June 2011, are forms, from "Sydney Gastric Balloon" at Concord, signed by Fiona and witnessed by Mr Ploder on 11 January 2011, in anticipation of the procedure, which specify the Ingleburn residence as her address. In a further (undated) document entitled "Healthwoods Specialist Centre Pre-Admission Form", Mr Ploder was named as Fiona's next of kin, and his relationship to her was specified as "De Facto". In another related (but undated) document entitled "Sydney Gastric Balloon - Patient Registration Form", Fiona indicated, in response to one of the questions on the form, that she had support from her "Partner".
39Ms Mammoliti alleges she received a call from Mr Ploder on or about 17 January 2011, advising that settlement of the Wetherill Park residence transaction had taken place, and that he and Fiona were going to move in together.
40Mr Kasic alleges that in late January 2011, Mr Ploder mentioned to Mr Kasic that he had bought, and would be moving into, the Wetherill Park residence and that he needed assistance to move Mr Ploder and Fiona's belongings into the Wetherill Park residence.
41In an affidavit (sworn on 28 May 2012), Michael Riley (Mr Riley), who works in the car sales industry, alleges he met Mr Ploder and Fiona on 6 February 2011, when Mr Ploder came to his showroom to trade in his vehicle to buy a new one. Mr Riley said Mr Ploder introduced Fiona to him as his fiancé, and that during the course of conversation, Fiona mentioned that she and Mr Ploder were moving out of Ingleburn and into their new home at Wetherill Park.
42At some point in time, Mr Ploder and Fiona moved into the Wetherill Park residence together. Mr Kasic says that on 11 February 2011, he and others, including Mr Ploder, Fiona, the defendant and Mr Garcea, all assisted with relocating from the Ingleburn residence to the Wetherill Park residence.
43Ms Rodriguez likewise alleges in her affidavit that she and others assisted in relocating the possessions of Mr Ploder and Fiona to the Wetherill Park residence. Ms Rodriguez also alleges that, whilst taking a break with Fiona from the relocation exercise, Fiona expressed gratitude for the gift of $100,000 provided by her parents towards the purchase of the Wetherill Park residence. Ms Rodriguez alleges that once the task of relocation was completed, Fiona took Ms Rodriguez on a tour of the house, together with the defendant. Ms Rodriguez alleges that during the tour, she noticed that a double bed had been moved into the master bedroom.
44The defendant alleges that, during or after the relocation of Mr Ploder and Fiona into the Wetherill Park residence (which is accepted took place on 12 February 2011), Mr Garcea set up Fiona's bedroom at the back of the house, Mr Ploder's bedroom was set up at the front of the house, the defendant had personally unpacked Fiona's clothes into Fiona's room at the back of the house, and Fiona slept in her own bedroom which contained all of her personal items and clothing. The defendant alleges she visited the Wetherill Park residence on 12, 13, 14, 15 and 17 February 2011, performed various domestic duties in the Wetherill Park residence, and observed that Fiona spent most of the day in her own room.
45It appears from the evidence to be common ground that Fiona had been suffering from depression or bodily dimorphic disorder for some time. After returning home from his friend's house at about 1:30am on 19 February 2011, Mr Ploder discovered Fiona's body hanging by a rope supported to the roof of the garage at the Wetherill Park residence. Under Fiona's will, dated 9 October 2008, the defendant was named as the sole beneficiary of Fiona's estate.
46In her affidavit, Ms Rodriguez gives evidence that on 19 February 2011, she visited the Concord residence, where Mr Ploder, the defendant and others were present, and she heard the defendant yelling and wailing, and asking herself why Fiona had taken her life after she had found Mr Ploder and was going to marry him.
47The defendant's first cousin, Anna Alessio (Ms Alessio), prepared an affidavit for the purpose of these proceedings. Ms Alessio lives in Victoria, but travelled to Sydney on 19 February 2011 to support the defendant and Mr Garcea following the death of Fiona. Ms Alessio alleges that after visiting the Concord residence on 19 February 2011, Mr Ploder, who she had just met for the first time that day, drove her to the hotel at which she was staying in Sydney, and that during the drive she had a conversation with Mr Ploder in which he said, in response to a question by Ms Alessio, that he did not have sexual relations with Fiona. Mr Ploder accepts he had a conversation with Ms Alessio when he drove her to a hotel from the Concord residence on 19 February 2011, but denies discussing with Ms Alessio anything in relation to his sexual relationship with Fiona.
48On 23 February 2011, the defendant placed an obituary in The Daily Telegraph newspaper in the following terms (Exhibit P1):
GARCEA, Fiona Rita Passed away February 18, 2011. Treasured and beloved daughter of Vittoria and Vincenzo, sister of Ramona, cherished and loved by fiancé Enzo ... Requiem Mass ... will be held ... on Friday, (February 25, 2011) ... For those wishing to pay their last respects a viewing will be held ... Thursday, (February 24, 2011) ...
49On 25 February 2011, at Fiona's funeral, Mr Ploder delivered a eulogy in the following terms:
My inspiration, My love, My strength, My advisor, My Happiness, My Best Friend and My Soul mate are but just some of the few words that come to the immediate mind when I think about the time I spent with Fiona.
How I so wish that this was a wedding speech and not a farewell Eulogy to a person who I loved more than life and to a family who greeted me with the warmth of their open arms.
For she taught me what to be loved realty felt like and that is an experience which I will carry till the end of my days.
Unremarkable is exactly what Fiona was for those who knew her, for she was as strong as a lion with a heart which was as soft and tender as a lamb yet as beautiful as an angel, is as I would describe her to those of you who didn't know her.
She loved her family and friends with all her heart and there was nothing she would not do for any of them. Yet to the people of this world she was a light, for those who met her never forgot her, for she loved them for who they where and not who they where perceived to be and she would go out of her way for any of them.
Unfortunately some of us might say we gather here today to farewell Fiona. Yet I say to you unfortunately we gather here today to farewell a fallen hero. For this girl fought with all her strength to beat this illness, for so many years, which I think most of us would not of lasted as long.
And even through the storm with all the burden she carried with her illness she was still able to be such a caring person and push herself to limits which most of us would not even begin to understand and that determination, strength and courage makes her a hero in my eyes.
In the end the illness took her, however at least I know she is now at peace and she will be greatly missed by all of us
To you Vicky and Vince my most deepest and sincerest sympathies and condolences, I really feel your pain through this dark and cloudy times, for you more than any one know how we felt about each other, and the mountains we had to climb together as a couple and as a family, just remember one thing, you have also gained a son now who loves you both very much and will always be there for you no matter what.
To all the of you who have come here today to farewell Fiona with us, thank you so much for coming i know this would mean a lot to her
As hard as this is to say at a moment like this, I'm deeply grateful to God for giving me the opportunity to meet my soul mate in life, eventhough it was not long enough at least I was given the chance to meet her in this lifetime, and for the experiences and unremarkable times we shared together as a couple, I will cherish them and treasure them for the rest of my life in this world and until eternity.
Farewell my Love I Love you so much
50The order of funeral booklet distributed in Fiona's funeral (Exhibit P2) contained several photographs of Fiona. The inside of the front cover of the booklet contained a large photo of Mr Ploder and Fiona embracing, with a caption, written by Mr Ploder, which read as follows:
Bubba I didn't get a chance to say goodbye to you, I will miss you, and I'll hold you here in my heart forever.
Thank you for being you: for who you are, the good times we shared, the special memories you have left behind will never be forgotten.
With all my love Enzo
51Mr Ploder alleges that shortly after Fiona's death, the defendant said to him that Fiona would have wanted him to keep the house, and that he responded by asking how that would be possible if the defendant was going to take 95% of the house.
52Ms Mammoliti alleges that, after receiving a series of missed calls from Mr Ploder between 18 and 22 February 2011, she finally managed to make telephone contact with him shortly after 25 February 2011. According to Ms Mammoliti, Mr Ploder was weeping as he told Ms Mammoliti that Fiona had taken her life, and that he had been trying to call her to inform her of the funeral which was held on 25 February 2011. Ms Mammoliti says she then asked Mr Ploder if she could speak with the defendant to convey her condolences, that she then spoke to the defendant on the same call, and that the defendant indicated she wanted Mr Ploder to repay the sum of $100,000 advanced by the defendant for the purchase of the Wetherill Park residence, plus Fiona's contribution of $65,000.
53Mr Ploder alleges that after Fiona's death, the defendant attended the Wetherill Park premises, entered the Mr Ploder and Fiona's joint bedroom, and removed from the wardrobe Fiona's clothes and personal items. The defendant accepts that she attended the Wetherill Park residence to collect Fiona's belongings, but alleges that there were no personal items or clothing belonging to Fiona in Mr Ploder's bedroom.
54On 7 March 2011, the solicitors retained by the defendant, Georgiou Solicitors & Attorneys & Co, responded to a letter apparently sent from the plaintiff's solicitors, Hall Partners, dated 1 March 2008. The letter of 7 March 2011 from the defendant's solicitors included the following statement:
In your correspondence you refer to your client as the "finance" (sic) of the Deceased. We are instructed that Miss Garcea was not living in a de facto relationship with your client and she had not been in such a relationship with him at any time.
It is our client's present intention to attend to collect the rest of her daughter's possessions. Please advise you (sic) client accordingly and confirm that amicable arrangements may be made for the collection of Miss Garcea's property without the need for any assistance from the Fairfield Patrol of the NSW Police.
55On 18 April 2011, solicitors retained by the defendant, Georgiou Solicitors & Attorneys & Co, wrote a letter to the solicitors acting for Mr Ploder in the following terms:
Put at its highest, the relationship between Miss Garcea and your client was no more than a girlfriend/boyfriend relationship. They were not engaged to be married and they most certainly were not living in a de facto relationship as husband and wife...or even a close personal relationship.
The friendship was of short duration. The parties "shared" a common residence for less than one week, there was no degree of financial interdependence between the parties, there was no mutuality of the performance of household tasks and there were no public aspects of a de facto or even domestic or close personal relationship. My clients deny any sexual liaison between Mr Ploder and their daughter. I am instructed that she was simply not well enough to engage in sexual activity notwithstanding her strict religious beliefs.
...
The sum of $100,000 was advanced by our client to her daughter and Mr Ploder as a loan, no matter how the transaction was characterised for the benefit of the registered first mortgagee.
56Some time probably after 29 June 2011 and certainly before 2 December 2011, Mr Ploder applied to First State Super (with whom Fiona held a superannuation account) to receive payment of the superannuation benefit, amounting to about $320,000. By way of background, during Fiona's employment as a school teacher, she had made a number of superannuation contributions through a salary sacrifice arrangement, and in a form dated 28 October 2008 (which is only about nineteen days after the date of her will), Fiona specified the defendant as the death benefit nominee.
57On 2 December 2011, First State Super wrote to Mr Hall, the solicitor for Mr Ploder, advising that it was determined that Mr Ploder's application, to receive payment of 100% of the superannuation benefit following Fiona's death, was effectively granted. On 12 June 2012, First State Super issued a further letter to Mr Hall indicating that, after receiving and considering an objection from the defendant to the initial determination, First State Super's Disputes Committee confirmed its determination that Mr Ploder would receive 100% of the deceased's superannuation benefit. First State Super's initial determination and subsequent confirmation of it, were based on its assessment of Mr Ploder's relation to the deceased as "de facto spouse". The defendant decided to escalate the matter to the Superannuation Complaints Tribunal and the Federal Court of Australia.
58There is further evidence of a more general nature which is relevant (or alleged to be relevant) to the nature of the relationship between the parties. I will identify and discuss that evidence under subsequent headings.